Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Meri Delhi meri shaan

Headline 14.04.08
Rajdhani ko yeh kya ho raha hai ?
Postmortem :
Yeh hai meri Delhi meri shaan
padh kar aisi khabre
dil ho jata pareshaan.

Budape ki jawani

Headline 14.04.08
Naami athlete ne lagaya Rushdi ke jeewan me jump.
Postmortem :
Kya kahenge inhe aap,
60 saal ke budhe ya 60 saal ke jawan

Apno ki meharbania

Headline 14.04.08
Vyavsai ki hatya me rishtedaar ka hi hath
Postmortem :
Inhe to apno ne mara, gero me kahan dum tha
kashti inki vahin dubi jahan pani kam tha.
(Published on 15.04.08)

Padosi ki lali

Headline 14.04.08
Nepal hua lal Congressi rang utra.
Postmortem :
Padosi ka mooh lal ho to apna
thapar maar kar mat kar lena.

Police ke karye

Headline 14.04.08
Kya kar rahi hai police ?
Postmortem :
Hafta vasuli, balatkaar, encounters aur
jhutey mukadme banana,
inke siva kisi aur kaam ka pata lage to batana.

Bijli ka kota

Headline 14.04.08
Kendra badayega bijli ka kota.
Postmortem :
Muft me nahi bhaiya, bill bhi bhejega tagra aur mota.
(Published on 15.04.08)

kissa kursi ka

Headline 12.04.08
Townhall me kursi ke liye BJP netao me ghamasaan.
Postmortem :
Arey bhai mere kyun hota hai pareshan
yahi to kissa kursi ka hai meri jaan.

AC kamro ke byan

Headline 12.04.08
Bijli katauti kisi bhi keemat par bardasht nahi : CM
Postmortem :
Band AC kamro me beth kar byan dena bahut asaan hai madam
janta ke beech jakar unke dard ko samjho to kuch baat bane.

Police aur Kanoon

Headline 12.04.08
Kisi ko bhi kanoon apne hath me
lene ka adhikar nahi : Mahila ayog
Postmortem :
Sivaye Delhi police ke.............

Qaidi ya Paisa ?

Headline 12.04.08
Delhi police ke haath se nikla qaidi.
Postmortem :
Hatho me to ek hi cheez aa sakti hai
Qaidi ya Paisa ? ab yeh faisla apko karna hai
ki in dono me se apko kya pakad ke rakhna hai ?

Samajik nyaye

Headline 11.04.08
Samajik nyaye ki jeet hui : Arjun
Postmortem :
Jahan 12 saal ke bache khudkashi kar rahe ho
aur 6 saal ki bachio ke sath balatkaar ho rahe ho
usey aap nyaye ki jeet kehte hai.... Dhaney hai aap.

Puney aur paisa

Headline 11.04.08
Dharmik yatrao me hai puney aur paisa.
Postmortem :
Hai to zarur, lekin farak hai
puney hai sirf yatra karne wale ke liye
aur paisa hai yatra karvane wale ke liye.

Congress bechegi tel

Headline 11.04.08
Congress bechegi tel.
Postmortem :
Mehngai ki maar ne kambakht ganja kar diya
verna tel lene ki hesiyat to hum bhi rakhte they.

Dil ki duria

Headline 10.04.08
Simtegi poorvi aur pashchim Delhi ki duria.
Postmortem :
Rastey chotey hue to kya hua,
duria dilo ki simtey to kuch baat bane.
(Published on 11.04.08)

Mashal par bwal

Headline 10.04.08
Mashal : siyasat aur bwal
Postmortem :
Kuch naya batao mere lal
yeh to hai vohi chamri, vohi khaal.

Khubsurti dekh behka

Headline 10.04.08
Khubsurti dekh behka : Ger.
Postmortem :
Arey bhai agar vishvamitra jaise tapasvio ki tapasya
bhang ho sakti hai to phir Ger saheb kya hai.

Keemate aasmaan par

Headline 10.04.08
Aasmaan chu sakte hai chawal ke daam
Postmortem :
Kisi aisi cheez ka naam batane ka kasht kare
jiske daam zameen par ho.

Khiladi ka khel

Headline 10.04.08
Khelgaon nirmaan ka kaam ruka.
Postmortem :
Zarur kisi khiladi ne apna khel khel diya hoga beech me.
(Published on 11.04.08)

Bjle companio ko mashvara

Headline 10.04.08
Saptah bhar me sudhrey bijkli compania
Postmortem
Jo kaam barso me na ho saka
vo saptah bhar me kaise ho jayega

Wazan Check

Headline 09.04.08
Samaan kharidtey waqt wazan bhi check kare
Postmotem :
Kiska vazan, samaan ka ya dukandaar ka ?
aur dukandaar ladki ho to ?

Delhi Noida chaka chak

Headlin 09.04.08
Delhi Noida ko chaka chak banane ki taiyari
Postmotem :
Crime me to vaise bhi inka javab nahi
aur baaki baato ka pata nahi.

Pati-patni ka khel

Headline 09.04.08
Hum pati-patni nahi : SanjayManyeta
Postmortem :
Hum to pati-patni ka khel khel rahe they My Lord.
(Publishd on 10.04.08)

Sampati kar ki vasuli

Headline 09.04.08
Sampati kar ki record vasuli
Postmortem :
Ar jo rakam be-hisab vasuli
uska hisab kaun dega hazur
(Published on 10.04.08)

Pars ka kamaal

Headline 08.04.08
Paris me 4 baar bhuji mashal
Postmortem :
Kamaal hai paris jaise shehar me to
bujhi mashaal jalne lati hai,
phir yeh kaise bhuj gai.

Sarkari jeb katre

Headline 08.04.08
Sahi nikli baat, bijli ke metre chal rahe fast.
Postmortem :
Arey hum to samajhte they jeb katre sirf
buso aur gadio me hi ghoomte hai......

TV ki karamaat

Headline 08.4.08
Bache ko swasth dekhna hai to band rakhe TV.
Postmortem :
Aur saas bahu ke serial bina kaise rahegi bivi.

Pratham mahila nahi.

Headline 08.04.08
Bruni sundar v sushil, par pratham mahila nahi.
Postmortem :
Sarkzi ke jeewan me to kai mahilaye aai hongi
phir yeh pratham kaise ho sakti hai.

Musharaf ko mashvara

Headline 08.04.08
Musharaf smarthak ne juttey khaye.
Postmortem :
Yeh dekh kar bhi janab ko samajh na aaye
to phir unhe kaun samjhaye.
(Published on 09.04.08)

Mehngai rokne ke upaye

Headline 07.04.08
Mehngai rokne ke liye aur kadam uthane honge : PM
Postmortem :
Sarkari vibhag aur sarkari karamchario se kahiye
vo apna hissa mangna chod de mehngai khud b khud rook
jayegi, aur koi kadam uthane ki zarurat hi nahi padegi.

Mehngai ka mudda.

Headlne 07.04.08
Mudda fir mehngai ka, karyeykram BJP ka.
Postmortem :
Arey hazoor 70 rupay kilo pyaz wala karyekram
bhi to aap hi ke raaj me chala tha.
(Published on 08.04.08)

Bhaktimay vatavaran

Headline 07.04.08
Navratra par bhaktimay hua vatavaran
Postmortem :
Theek kaha apne, pehle har roz 15 se 20
khabre chapti thi hinsa aur lootmaar ki
lekin aaj sif 6 hi chapi hai.

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Ramdev ke health drinks

Headline 05.04.08
Ab lijiye ramdev brand ke health drinks
Postmortem :
Yog ki khurak to bahut khila chuke
ab kuch peena pilana bhi ho jaye.
(Published on 06.04.08)

Jiska juta usika sar

Headline 05.04.08
Anadhikrat colonio ke liye praypat dhan.
Postmortem :
Inhi ka paisa inhi ke liye keh kar kaun sa
teer maar liya apne.

Vidhayako ko chetawani

Headline 05.04.08
Nadarad rehne wale vidhayako ko chetawani.
Postmortem :
Kash koi to kaam aisa kiya hota, jis se yeh
shakal dikhane ke kabil to rehte.
(Published on 06.04.08)

Paise ka khel

Headline 05.04.08
Ab salman bhi nazar ayenge TV par.
Postmortem :
Arey inhe to paisa milna chahiye,
nazar to yeh kahin bhi aa jayenge.
(Published on 06.04.08)

Kabhi takht kabhi takhta

Headline 04.04.08
20 20 Ke sher hue 20 me hi dher.
Postmortem :
Kabhi takht to kabhi takhta
yahi hai waqt ka pher.

Balebaazo ghabrahat

Headline 04.04.08
Bhartiye balebaaz ghabra gaye they
Postmortem :
Kyun bhai bivio ki yaad aa gai thi ya
income tax walo ki

Team India ka dukh

Headline 04.04.08
Pitch se shikayat nahi, hum hi kahrab khele.
Postmortem :
Koi baat nahi bacha, pashchataap kar liya
ab agli bari me prayeshchit kar lena hisab barabar.

Zar-Joru-Zameen aur Jal

Headline 04.04.08
Pani par bhaiyo me sangharsh, 7 ghayal
Postmortem :
Ab zar, joru, zameen ke sath sath
'jal' bhi jod lena, muhavara pura ho jayega.

5 Pandav

Headline 03.04.08
5 gendbazo ke pher me team india.
Postmortem :
Itihas gavah hai, 5 pandav hi kafi they
100 kauravo ke liye.

Khel-khel me

Headline 03.04.08
Khelte hue bacha kuyen me gira.
Postmortem :
Khel-khel me to bado ko girte bhi
waqt nahi lagta, phir yeh to bacha tha.

Khurana ki ghar wapsi

Headline 03.04.08
Khurana ki ghar wapsi isi saptah.
Postmortem :
Kyun bhai beti ghar aa rahi hai ya
damad sasural ja raha hai ?
(Published on 04.04.08)

Bhai ka manobal

Headline 03.04.08
Thane se kuch hi duri par hui loot.
Postmortem :
Ab bhai pass ho to manobal badh hi jata hai.

Cyber crime ke gur

Headline 03.04.08
Cyber crime ke gur seekh rahi police.
Postmortem :
Kaise gur bhaiya, crime rokne ke ya karne ke ?
(Published on 04.04.08)

Amitabh ke thumke

Headline 02.04.08
Maya Amitabh ko tang kar rahi hai.
Postmortem :
Ab char thumke maya ke kehne
par bhi laga diye hote to shayad aaj
yeh naubat na aati.
(Published on 03.04.08)

Saza par rahat

Headline 02.04.08
Saza sun kar R.K.Sharma ne li rahat ki saans.
Postmortem :
Arey kamaal karte hai sharma ji, apko saza
sunai gai hai hai koi param veer chakar nahi
diya gaya jo aap rahat ki saans le rahe hai.
(Published on 03.04.08)

Cylinder 600 ka

Headline 02.04.08
Mahine me dusra cylinder chahiye ?
600 me milega.
Postmortem :
Bahut khub, ab black karne wale bhi
MRP tey karne lage.
(Published on 03.04.08)

Me tere pyar me....

Headline 02.04.08
Rashtrapati padak vijeta ko akhir le duba affair.
Postmortem :
Me tere pyar me kya kya na bana dilbar
chuda ke apna ashiana le chale vo sakari ghar.
(Published on 03.04.08)

Atamnirbhar Delhi

Headline 02.04.08
Bijli ke mamle me atam nirbhar hogi Delhi.
Postmortem :
Zarur hogi kyun ki aane wale dino me
har ghar apko generator ya invertor
dikh hi jayega.
(Published on 03.04.08)

Jalvayu ka sath

Headline 02.04.08
Sath nahi de rahi jalvayu.
Postmortem :
Jal me kachra aur vayu me
dhuan bharoge to kaise sathe
degi jalvayu.
(Published on 03.04.08)

Nasbandi aur bandook

Headline 02.04.08
Nasbandi karaiye, bandook ka license le jaiye.
Postmortem :
Abaadi par jab laga di lagam,
to phir bandook ka kya kaam.
(Published on 03.04.08)

Khel nahi hai shadi

Headline 02.04.08
Khel nahi hai shadi, jab chaha tod diya
Postmortem :
Shadi to dilo ka mel hai,
vichar mil jaye to shadi
nahi to khel hai.
(Published on 03.04.08)